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What's fresh and new in the life and work of Seska Lee. I
Got A Secret I was up early this morning and at a secret breakfast meeting. Well, the meeting is not a secret. I just told you about it. But the topic of the meeting, well, that is a secret. I can say it is something that I first considered many, many months ago and I am now revisiting since someone else had the same idea and wants to make it a reality. More meetings will now ensue 3nd by the end of the month we should be able to make the announcement of what this secret actually is. Until then, my lips are sealed (and my brain will be a storming). Now a new little segment for the blog... Seska : Today Web reading: Hard to swallow: the truth behind the health myths Video viewing: Ducklings Song in my head: Mr. Roboto Run
Seska Run I am back on a consistent running schedule. I am so happy about that. During the Fringe Festival my schedule was geared towards the play and the late nights so I was getting the bare minimum of sleep and I was on the go when I was awake. Exercise was all the walking and dancing I was doing (which was quite a bit). Still I missed my running. I have been sticking to short and steady 3k runs this week. Starting next week I will add a couple 5ks and later add a slow, long run the following week. I want to get back to my happy running distance of regular 8ks with a long run of 12k once a week. Also on the agenda is to get back to the yoga studio. It is a a few metro stops away from my house and while I have been pretty good about going (before the Fringe anyway) I am wondering if I should find a studio closer to home. A bit more research needs to be done I think. your summer exercise regime? | semi permalink New
Glasses I am so excited. I got new glasses. I have known I needed I new prescription for some time now and finally got around to going to the optometrist for an examination. She confirmed it. I am more near sighted than ever. So she set me up with a nice new pair of glasses. I am also to stay off contact lens for awhile as my eyes are sensitive to them and I have been experiencing some serious irritation from them. No worries there as I love my new pair. They are black and a bit retro. The frames are very solid and best of all I can see so much better!
You can see me in webcam action tonight – wearing my new glasses of course! Tuesday
July 1st Weekend
Trip I went away for the weekend. My friend Joe lives there now. For those of you new to the blog, he is my boyfriend. We have been seeing each polyamorous style for 6 years. We get along tremendously well and work hard to make the relationship work. Having multiple partners is a bit tough for me because it requires me to bring on my A level time management skills as well as the ability to divide my attention yet focus it at the same time. I try to live in the moment and be very present when I am with him (or with James or whomever for that matter), but when you are in more than one serious relationship as well as a few other kinds of relationships you always have other things buzzing through your brain. It can be tricky. Joe moved to Toronto for work in late January and we have had to renegotiate our relationship a bit to deal with its long distance nature. We are definitely in an adjustment period. He has been able to come home for visits, but I have to share him with his friends (he has a very active social life when he is in Montreal). This weekend was the first time I had to go visit him so I was excited about having all this time to focus on him and us. The visit was quite nice. We went to some amazing vegan restaurants. We walked a lot. We watched some movies. We snuggled. We had sex. We showered together. All very nice. Unfortunately, the trip got cut short when he got some news of a death in the family and we had to head back to Montreal early. The drive back was weird as was the time spent when we got back. We were both in a bit of a state of shock. I have been a little mellow and zoned out since (I am friends with the family as well). It has definitely been an odd weekend. Besides contemplating things like life and death I have been sending out all the positivity and compassion I can to the family involved. In
The Background I had a slightly surreal late night in bed experience. I could hear that James was watching television in the living room – The Daily Show. Coldplay was a guest and they were playing a song from their new CD. I realized as I lay in the dark that their new material fit my mood. It had that melancholy sound to it. I was feeling melancholy. I was tired but unable to sleep. My mind was shooting off into a million directions all at once. I could not relax. I could not feel at ease. Rest was evading me. I was chasing it with my fingers. Fingers on my breasts, nipples, clit. I tried to focus on something pleasant, something arousing, something I wanted to experience again. I went through my personal, internal, sexual Rolodex searching for familiar faces, ones that inspire me. These are men and women who have driven me to the heights of passion and desire. These are individuals who have touched me in ways that made me wild and dizzy with lust. But instead of being able to focus on them I was disturbed by the memories of less than stellar sex, of mishaps, and regrets. While Coldplay was on in the background. Unnecessary
Sex Toy Advice I had some new people in my chat room last night. I get new people all the time but sometimes they make their presence known more than other times. Last night it was someone new to me, rather than new to webcam shows, I think. People new to webcam shows tend to be very chatty about how this is their first time and they ask a lot of questions, make many requests and don’t seem to realize that they are sharing the chat room with a hundred or so other people. Very much self involved. Sometimes in an obnoxious way and sometimes in an eager way. I try to help them along as do the regulars and the more experienced webcam show viewers. Last night there were a few people who seemed familiar with webcam shows but not to me so they did not know my show style, my background, my philosophy on sex. Such people sometimes make their presence known with inappropriate behaviour and comments which makes them all the more obvious. One person was going by a female moniker but who knows if she was truly female (you never know with the Net). If she was then she was not particularly friendly to other women. She told other chatters that I was just OK (in terms of looks I suppose) and expressed other feelings of disinterest and judgment in what I was doing on cam (enjoying myself while using a vibrator – wow, how boring!). She also told me I should be using different dildo than the one I was using. I had two issues with this:
I advised this person on the difference between dildos and vibrators and told her that there are tonnes of great articles on the web about them that she could check out. Knowledge is power especially when it comes to sex, I say. Then she told me she has a rabbit and egg and I should use them (neither of which are dildos, mind you – while they can be used for penetration if they vibrate then they are vibrators – pointe finale according to sex toy experts – I’ve done the research for an article and taken a workshop on the subject). I told her that in the near ten years of doing webcam shows and the 15 years of using sex toys I have experimented with many models of toys and purchased a great many indeed. I find that both rabbits and eggs break easily. They have their enjoyable features, but in terms of quality and longevity (and to get off) I prefer other toys. Now the other issue I had with this ‘advice’ from her is that at the time I was using a very high quality vibrator purchased for me by one of my loyal website members. My guess is that she has never purchased a webcam performer such a toy, never mind her own favourites. Also based on the dated nature of her selections (Sex in the City rabbit episode anyone?) and all the amazing sex toys that have come on to the market since then makes me wonder if she really has those toys for “herself”. In any case, this exchange only went on for a few minutes. It was distracting for me as I was moving towards orgasm number one. I wanted to address her comments though because I see my webcam shows as an opportunity to share my sexual experience and knowledge. If I see a teaching moment I take it. Once an issue is addressed I move on which is what I did last night – onto orgasm number two and orgasm number three – plus, some amazing intercourse with James. any more unnecessary advice? ;-) | semi permalink Live
Webcam Show Tonight! It is a holiday here in the province of Quebec. A national holiday – kinda – our politics are special that way. In any case, there still will be a webcam show tonight. There will be fireworks outside and inside. Wink wink. Tuesday
June 24th Moving
Back to Normal I am utterly exhausted. Utterly. That word makes me think of udders and when I am writing out the word utterly I have to double check to make sure I have not written out udderly. OK, I just looked it over and I wrote the right word. That bit of nonsense offers up a good example of the state of my brain right now. Exhausted. The Montreal Fringe Festival experience was an amazing one, but I definitely did not get enough sleep. I also definitely pushed my boundaries when it came to social networking and being friendly. I came out of my shell and got to meet and socialize with a broad range of performers and volunteers. I am quite pleased with myself. I am sure there were moments of social awkwardness, but moving from the sidelines to right in the middle of the action was worth it. I feel that I am finding my place in the Montreal Fringe community. I am also pleased with Team Burlesque’s presence at the festival. I think we starting to come together in a wonderful way and that people are starting to take notice of our efforts. I performed three times besides what I did in The Dragpiper and at our special event show. L Diablo and I did our Cheerleader number on a hot sunny Sunday morning plus Miss Sugarpuss and I did a special birthday number for one of the tech people on Friday June 13th and then my zombie number on Friday June 20th. For those of you who have wanted to see me perform, now you can. The organizers of the fest filmed it and posted it online on You Tube. We also got a very nice little write up in the Montreal Gazette. Very nice! Now I have an absolute tonne of laundry to do and a bunch of burlesque costumes to carefully put away. I figure by Wednesday my life will be back to normal. Bittersweet I am not smiling as much as I was before. It has to do with a little romance I had. I met a fellow opening night. I felt bold and made a move. We spent the next few nights kissing and kissing and kissing. It was just delightful. He is delightful. So funny and smart and talented and enthusiastic. Also shy, intense and goofy. I intimidated him with my forwardness and things got a little awkward. Still, after a little more boldness on my part things were consummated and in a really lovely passionate way. Such a sweet guy. Sexy too. And now he is moving on to the next city, the next festival. And it feels bittersweet for me. I am not smiling as much as I was before. |
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